eulogy.

So I know I mentioned “deathbed-me” in my last post. And I know that that’s kind of a gruesome thing to write about. But I’ve been watching a lot of motivational videos lately. And one thing that keeps popping up as the be-all, end-all yardstick of something being worthwhile or not, is if on your deathbed, you’re going to be happy you did said thing, or if you’ll regret it. Now, some things you just gotta do, whether deathbed you wants to or not, like brushing your teeth and eating your veges. But for the most part, the time spent decision-making in your life, all comes down to one question: will I be proud of this at the end of my life?

And so, one of the videos I was watching encouraged everyone to write down a list of things you would want people to talk about at your funeral, and focus the rest of your life on becoming those things. So that’s what I did. Here is a portion of said list, as the real one (as per usual) is eons longer:

  1. Her quirkiness, silliness, and authenticity
  2. The kindness and warmth she emitted to others
  3. How she helped others feel less alone
  4. Her encouragement of others to believe in themselves and reach for the stars
  5. How she got over her laziness and led a super productive and meaningful life
  6. How she used every obstacle as a stepping stone to get closer to her goals (or as some like to call it “failing forward”)
  7. How strong and brave she was (still having feelings and moments of weakness and fear, but having the courage to push through and past them)
  8. Her lifelong commitment to learning, growing, and working on herself
  9. Her honesty, goodness, and desire to do things “right” (but not perfectly)
  10. Her enthusiasm/zest for life
  11. The deep connection she had with those closest to her (family, friends), that always made them feel special
  12. Her love of G-d and the special relationship she formed with Him, that didn’t exactly fit the mold of that which was expected of her

Okay, so if I’m being honest, this list makes me uncomfortable because,

  • it will probably change as the years go on.                                                                     
  • I have quite a ways to go if this is what I want others to say about me at my funeral.  
  • I’m pretty sure I’ll have like maybe two people at my funeral, if I’m lucky. I don’t need these things to be said about me in reality (though they’d be great for my ego). But I do need to know that these things were what my life was all about, if only for myself, whether they’re spoken about or not.

I’m so curious to know one or more things you guys would like to be known for. Please share in the comments below if you’re comfortable. Here’s to living our best lives. 

All the best,

Nehama

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